Eve
It’s Christmas Eve in most parts of the world. I opted to work at home today, since I was the *only* person in my office yesterday. Ever been the only person working? It was eerily quiet. And every noise convinced me some mass murderer was coming to get me. Happy holidays, right?
So, today I’m at home. After work, Sweets and I will exchange gifts. This is the first year in many we’ll exchange gifts alone, instead of as part of the larger family celebration. I think Sweets got nervous this year about gift giving.
The other night, he asked me what I wanted for the holidays, even though I sent him a list a few weeks ago (he stresses that he’s not very creative, so lists really help him focus on things that will make me happy). I could tell he was stressed, despite the list. I asked if he bought me anything yet. He said yes. So, I told him, I needed nothing more.
He was still concerned. So, I told him to buy me a slow cooker cookbook (since we just bought a slow cooker). He wrinkled his nose and said no. I told him I need/want nothing more. That didn’t seem to alleviate his woes; he said he was worried he didn’t get me enough.
I wasn’t concerned and asked if it’d make him feel better if we exchanged gifts prior to joining his family for the bigger gift exchange. He nodded his head, yes, and said he needed to wrap some stuff first.
Later, as we were going to bed, Sweets asked me how much money I spent on his gifts. Now, that’s a hard question to answer.
You see, some of his gifts are really gifts for us. Like the tickets to see August: Osage County. I bought them for him because he’s never seen the show, but I promise I’m excited to see it again (it’s been a few years since I first saw it when it originated in Chicago). Like the Black Eyed Peas CD and tickets to see their concert. Sure, BEP is probably Sweets’ all-time favorite group. But, I promise you I’ll be rocking out to that show, too. Like the CD to a jazz musician we saw in New York last spring.
Sure, all these gifts are technically for Sweets, but I guarantee I’ll be equally enjoying them. So, it was difficult to answer that question for him. I squirmed for a second and came up with a number. He seemed satisfied with that number. And so, we went to bed.
Tonight I will be giving him those tickets, CDs and some clothes. I’m excited to give Sweets gifts because, well, because I know it makes him happy. And it makes me happy to see him happy.
In some ways, I’m glad to get our gift exchange out of the way. To me, giving gifts is only part of what the holidays are all about. More important to me is the time we spend with loved ones. With his family and mine. With friends. With each other. May your holiday surround you with the warm and fuzzy feelings only achieved by being with the ones you love.
December 24th, 2009 at 7:50 am
I hope you both have a wonderful holiday. Merry Christmas to both you and Sweets. :)
December 24th, 2009 at 9:05 am
Merry Christmas!
Today I am one of only a few working…yesterday there were a few more, but it was still quiet. I’m hoping time passes by quickly….
December 24th, 2009 at 9:34 am
Have a wonderful few days Nilsa! I think its special to exchange gifts with Sweets in private. Seeing others happy makes me genuinely happy too.
Merry Christmas!
December 24th, 2009 at 10:10 am
i don’t know what t got me this year…he keeps talking about it, like he does each year, hoping that I want to know what it is…NOW. he always wants to know what his gifts are, and also wants me to want to know what he got me as well.
some of mine are the “both” variety, where they serve the dual purpose for both of us…so, it’s kind of not really a gift that is fully for him.
i did order him an old-school thing that i KNOW he’ll love. that will be given to him tomorrow at my parents, along with some items that he wanted to stock up on because they are now discontinued.
December 24th, 2009 at 10:15 am
Torsten and I set a low limit this year, because we already purchased a recliner that was intended to be a joint Christmas gift to each other. But then he found something out of the price range and decided to buy it. Apparently the plan is that when I open it, we will decide together if that is a good way to spend our money right now?? We’ll see.
December 24th, 2009 at 10:23 am
This year Mister and I decided to not to big presents but to each have $100 to spend on stockings and it’s so much fun & it’s taken the present equality anxiety out of the equation for us.
And you also can’t fit $100 worth of pretty much anything in a stocking so you feel like you’re really giving a lot lol
December 24th, 2009 at 10:37 am
I get “present anxiety” too, so I understand Sweets completely :) Hope you two enjoy your holiday time together! xo
December 24th, 2009 at 11:08 am
Merry Christmas! Those concert tickets sound amazing! Gift anxiety is why we chose the vacation—we enjoyed it as much (if not more) than the kids, we had lots of great time together, and very little gift anxiety!!!
December 24th, 2009 at 12:19 pm
sweets is going to be so excited!!
and i think it’s sweet (ha!) that he gets nervous about it.
merry christmas my friend, xoxo
December 24th, 2009 at 1:24 pm
It’s tough when gifting puts pressure on a person. The way I try to see it is that a gift is only a true gift if it’s given with no expectation of anything in return. If there has to be an exchange of items of equal value, that’s bartering. I have occasionally comforted both myself and others with this definition.
December 24th, 2009 at 1:41 pm
Excellent gifts! August: Osage County is awesome and I’m sure Sweets will love it.
DD and I set a low gift limit this year as we are going to Mexico in February and that’s our joint gift. However, we just opened gifts this morning and both of us had exceeded the limit…him by more than twice! This isn’t unusual for us, which is why I also have a bit of gift anxiety, too. I know it shouldn’t be about spending a certain amount of money, but I still feel inadequate when he spends above and beyond on me what I do for him.
December 24th, 2009 at 2:29 pm
Being alone in the office is so scary! Sound like you and Sweets are going to have an amazing holiday.
December 24th, 2009 at 3:48 pm
haha yes! when i was in a relationship a lot of my gifts were definitely for him, too. i’m not sure if i like that, or not. or if it’s neutral. at the time, i guess i didn’t mind.
December 24th, 2009 at 4:00 pm
Great post! As you know, it’s not about the gifts for us this year either. We just want to have fun and chill with family.
But with that being said, Sweets is going to love his gifts! I love the BEP. I can’t wait to hear about that concert AND what he got you :)
December 25th, 2009 at 10:04 pm
aww how nice! I definitely understand Sweets on the nervousness. It’s such an awkward feeling when you realize you’ve under-gifted.
December 26th, 2009 at 5:34 pm
Those are lovely presents! Let us know what he got you :).
December 27th, 2009 at 7:34 pm
Sharing presents just the two of you is special! in the past, when i’ve had boyfriends, I’ve always saved the present exchange for when it is just the two of us. Not in front of family or friends partially because I get shy about opening presents and also because I am shy about giving them as well. Hope he loved the presents! =)
December 27th, 2009 at 10:18 pm
I agree with you on the gift giving piece. I always get nervous about it. I love buying gifts for others but feel awkward when we all open them together. Hope you had a good weekend!
December 28th, 2009 at 3:55 am
Family, food and fun. Perfect holiday recipe in my book. The hubs and I just got each other a few little things this year. IT was all about the dude!
December 28th, 2009 at 10:08 am
Matt was getting so frustrated with me when I kept telling him he didn’t need to get me anything and refused to give him ideas. I finally broke down and gave him a few pointers (he was getting really mad). From now on I think I’ll just give him a list of idea like you did with Sweets.
Hope you had a wonderful holiday lady!