Snob
Good friends of mine have this way of describing elitist behavior. They pretend they have a pipe in their mouths. They take their hands, pretending to cup the bottom of said pipes. And, they say, with their nose slightly raised, “Pah-pah-pah-pah-pah-pah,” as if they were actually taking puffs from the pipe. The more snobby the behavior, the bigger and longer the pipe gets and the longer they extend their arm in front of their faces.
It’s actually quite hilarious (or maybe not, but it’s right up my humor alley). Before Sweets met them, I used this story to describe why I love these friends so dearly. I think he fell in love, sight unseen (and has since grown to love them more).
The thing about snobby behavior is we all have it in us. Believe me, at one point or another, I’ve been called out on my puff-worthy behavior. For example …
- I don’t read romance novels. In fact, I might argue a number of novelist of that sort are, at best, junky word whores.
- I generally don’t like TV sitcoms. If the show is 30 minutes and you’re supposed to laugh, in all likelihood, I won’t; I deem them a waste of my time.
- And don’t get me started on movies like Dumb & Dumber or The Hangover. I don’t find them funny. Really, I don’t. In fact, I fell asleep during The Hangover.
- I refuse to get a Twitter account. I just don’t care to micro-follow my friend’s lives to such a small degree. Is any of it really that important? Usually not.
- I don’t do canned or frozen produce. If it’s not fresh, I likely won’t eat it.
- Because my favorite college hoops team is the North Carolina Tar Heels, I don’t really know what it’s like to follow a team that rarely gets into (and stays in) the Top 25.
That said, I’m by no means perfect. I mean, c’mon for every action above, there’s an equal (and sometimes more powerful) reaction below …
- I may not read romance novels, but the fact of the matter is, I really don’t read nearly enough. What’s worse: reading crap or not reading at all?
- While I don’t like TV sitcoms, not only do I like a few here and there, but I like all sorts of other TV shows that most people would deem ridiculously irrelevant (hello Housewives, Amazing Race, Say Yes to the Dress and House Hunters).
- Like bad books, the problem with my movie snobbery is I really don’t go to the movies all that often. Avatar was the first movie I’d seen in a theater in a year and half (and I didn’t even like the movie all that much). I’m not kidding.
- I don’t Twitter, yet I blog. And many could argue that they don’t want to follow my life on such a minute level (in which case I suggest they just don’t read it, just like I don’t follow them on Twitter – ha!).
- I won’t do the canned or frozen produce, but I will eat jarred pasta sauce and am happy to use frozen limeade in my margaritas. Go figure.
- Just because my favored hoops team has an amazing history doesn’t mean they don’t have bad seasons once in a while. Oh and when you’re a Tar Heels fan having a bad season (like this one!), everyone else is sure to remind you.
Is there anything in your life that makes you pah-pah-pah-puff worthy?
February 9th, 2010 at 8:49 am
Ha, I have friends who do something similar. Its quite funny to watch. I’ve been called out before for snobbery as well. I am a complete book snob (and fully admit it). When people tell me they read a lot, and then proceed to rattle off nothing but chick lit, I really have to bite my tongue.
February 9th, 2010 at 8:53 am
I have too many pah-pah worthy moments to list them all here. I do agree with you, however, that The Hangover and Avatar weren’t good. I’ve never seen Dumb and Dumber, which may speak to snobishness right there. Oh, and romance novels, don’t get me started.
February 9th, 2010 at 9:11 am
I am a pizza snob but, working on it. I read a lot more of a mix of chick lit and other types of books I am sure that I have more snob tendencies but can’t think of any right now.
February 9th, 2010 at 9:30 am
Confession: There is one series of “romance” novels that I will read and I think it’s because it’s not the trashy kind (No, really!) and has a lot of other elements like mystery in it.
As for my pah-pah-pah moments, I don’t like to eat leftovers yet I take them home with me anyway.
I don’t watch the Grammys or Golden Globes cause I think it’s a lot of fuss about nothing but I host an Oscar Party each year.
I refuse to eat at Italian chain restaurants (that’s really just how I was brought up, I think) yet other chains like Chipotle are on my favorite food list.
February 9th, 2010 at 9:33 am
i too am the one that is the “hangover” genre movie (whatever that is) snob. i cannot stand anything like it. i left during knocked up, didn’t see the hangover. i just hate those moviews.
i’m a food snob. i’d rather not eat, than eat something “sub-par”, yet one of my favorite things is taco bell bean burritos
i’m also with you on the sitcoms. just not into them. i dont’ think their funny…especially ones like “That 70s show”. i will sit in silence rather than sit through that. yet, i’ll watch all the smutty reality TV in the world.
February 9th, 2010 at 9:38 am
I’m a tomato snob. I grew up eating fresh tomatoes from the garden and I will not eat those vaguely pinkish, tomato shaped THINGS in the supermarket.
Also, garlic snob. I don’t use dried garlic, or the stuff in the jar. I chop it. With a knife. Every time.
I have a confession on the jarred pasta sauce thing. I make sauce, but it’s not because I’m sauce snob. It’s just that I get overwhelmed in the pasta sauce aisle at the store because there ARE SO MANY FREAKING KINDS.
February 9th, 2010 at 9:46 am
I love “beach trash” books for what they are -- easy, fun, fantasy. But I have SO MANY elitist tendencies. I prejudge people who are eccentric/hippie looking. I don’t like any thing sci-fi related. I won’t watch any “adult” cartoons like Simpsons or Family Guy. I won’t eat food that has been cooked, frozen and reheated. I get irritated by people who talk about their pets as children. I have huge intolerance for people who jump on any bandwagon becuase it is trendy -- even if that means they end up agreeing with me.
That’s enough, but I probably could go on and on.
February 9th, 2010 at 9:52 am
Junky word whores, huh? I may not write romance but I think WANT to be a Junky Word Whore. I love it!
As for being snobby. I am so snobby. I am also Snobby’s best friend: Prissy. The two do not go well together. Example? I hate showering in less than pristine conditions. The rub? I live in less than pristine conditions and am always finding ways to interpret that as me being an undervalued artist or something compared to my friends with nice jobs and nice bathrooms who are probably unhappy. ;)
February 9th, 2010 at 10:14 am
I don’t like the movie Dumb & Dumber. I thought the Hangover was just alright. So we’re in the same boat there. Though I will say that shows like 30 Rock and Modern Family and The Office? They DO make me laugh out loud when watching them- much to my surprise. I like my humor with a side of snark and wit.
One thing that’s snobby about me is I will turn up my nose at restaurants like Applebee’s but sometimes I really want a taco from Taco Bell. I am sure there are others but this is the first thing that came to mind.
February 9th, 2010 at 10:42 am
I LOVE Say Yes to the Dress and House Hunters. LOVE.
I’m sure there are things that make me snob-worthy, but you know, there’s a difference between not liking something and judging other people for liking it. The former is a matter of personal taste while the latter is just plain rude. And that’s really what I think of as snobbishness. And I generally tend to assume that snobby people are only snobby because they themselves are actually insecure.
February 9th, 2010 at 10:44 am
Oh I’m totally with you on not reading romance novels. And bad sitcoms and movies. We got the Hangover because a bunch of our friends had said how incredibly hilarious it was. Halfway through, I asked if we could put something else in. By the end, we just looked at each other and said how awful it was. I can be a bit of a snob when it comes to music. If there’s a song Sweet introduces me to that he heard on his CBC radio I’ll turn my nose up. But if I hear it on my beloved BBC I’m all over it! :)
February 9th, 2010 at 10:50 am
I don’t know. I don’t watch tv much or movies, but when I first watched Celebrity Rehab? Hooked. You can bet I was screaming at top volume when my cable went out last week on Thursday night. Ha!
And people who tell me about their “church” make me want to PUUUKKKEEEE. After working for the church for 10 years, I have no tolerance whatsoever for religion.
February 9th, 2010 at 11:26 am
ha, i like your impression of them!
February 9th, 2010 at 11:27 am
Your first snob admission reminded me of the time I tried to suggest a book to the guy at the library. I asked him if he’d read Same Kind of Different as Me, and he looked at me and said, “uh, I don’t read fiction.” I snapped back: “it’s not fiction!” Just because I had a few novels I was checking out. . . . geesh!
I could say I’m a reality show snob since I despise The Bachelor, Amazing Race, and Survivor. But I did get totally sucked into the stupid Jersey Shore. Yeah, that’s my confession for the day!
February 9th, 2010 at 11:32 am
CP is a total cooking snob. When we met I was still using garlic powder or the canned, already minced garlic. Well, that was THE MOST RIDICULOUS THING he had ever seen. And banned it from our house when I moved in.
This past weekend we went out to dinner in the next town over and decided that the restaurant served “old fashioned” food. As in, the chef tried to smother everything in sauce. I’m okay with being a food snob though. :-)
February 9th, 2010 at 12:10 pm
Oh I am the biggest snob in my friendship groups.
I rarely ride on buses, I just end up turning my nose up at people -- which is really bad, but I can’t help it!!!
I often pay full whack rent on a small student flat if it means the walls are clean, and everything has been redecorated -- hence why I’m struggling to find somewhere to live for next year.
I won’t drink from the same glass or cup twice; I find it dirty and often tell people this.
I judge people in my head by how they dress/speak/act. This is the worst, and I’m labelled a bitch by lots of people! It’s not like I’m even well off or living in a huge house, I just have high standards! Oh I can’t even explain my logic haha!
February 9th, 2010 at 12:50 pm
I used to think the same way as you when it came to Twitter. But since I joined I could not be happier about it. It’s not really following what people do all day as much as just a big instant message room. That’s how I see it anyway.
And I’m a tv geek BUT I’m not that into sitcoms either. After Friends went away…nothing has sparked my interest except Modern Family. NOw that is a funny show!
I have so many things though I could list…I don’t even know where to start so I wont :)
February 9th, 2010 at 12:58 pm
Oh most certainly I am a snob. About clothing (not as in “I’m a labelwhore,” but more there is never an excuse for Crocs or wearing pajamas out of the house and leggings are not pants!) and about books (if the last book you read was by Dan Brown, I make certain assumptions) and about art (*shudder* Thomas Kinkaid *shudder*) and about food. The only fast food I’ll eat (and I’ve been this way since 7th grade) is In-n-Out burgers, milkshakes (which are already terrible for me, so I figure what the hell) and the grilled chicken sandwich at Carl’s Jr. If I see someone with a McDonald’s or Taco Bell bag, I judge. It’s terrible, but true.
Oh and I’m a pizza snob (NY style). There is no such thing as good NY pizza in California. I love this state, but it’s true.
February 9th, 2010 at 1:13 pm
Things I could be considered snobby about: Facebook, movies (can’t stand to waste my time watching a bad one), and nonsensical conservatives. I actually think that’s about it. I really do try not to judge others though — different strokes for different folks and all that.
Also, I think frozen veggies are supposed to be pretty good for you because they are flash frozen when they are fresh? At least that’s what I’ve heard, but maybe that is from the frozen veggie industry! Like you I prefer fresh, but they’ll do for me in a pinch.
February 9th, 2010 at 1:40 pm
I’m unapologetically a music snob. I often refuse to give a band another chance if I dislike their first album. I also tend to dislike Top 40 musicians based solely on their popularity. It’s not logical or even reasonable and yet I continue my snobbish ways :)
February 9th, 2010 at 1:54 pm
I am a foodie snob. I would be worse if I could afford it. I try to keep it in check, but really? I am a snob.
I am also a politics snob. I expect everyone to follow national politics intently, and then am disgusted to find out they’ve filled their lives with other MEANINGFUL things.
February 9th, 2010 at 2:08 pm
I’m the biggest snob I know. And I’m really two-faced about it because I hate snobs.
Though I love your snobbery. :D
February 9th, 2010 at 2:38 pm
I’ve grown less snobby as I’ve grown older. I don’t enjoy rom-com movies, or movies about guys acting stupid, but I recently borrowed a mystery/romance/vampire novel from a friend and truly enjoyed it. Well, it was published by an offshoot of Penguin, and they have very high standards, so I guess I still satisfied my inner snob with that pedigree.
February 9th, 2010 at 3:03 pm
i refuse to read anything mainstream or overly popular, unless i was already into it before it was popular. i do this with music, too. luckily, twilight became extremely “hip” before i wanted anything to do with it, so now i hate it…for no real reason other than what i’ve heard from other people.
i refuse to wear hand-me-downs or take in used furniture. i will not shop at goodwill or second-hand stores because i don’t like the feeling of cloth that has been used by however many other people. something about not being able to trust the cleanliness.
i hate fake plants, i think they are the dumbest idea. no real reason, other than that they always look obviously fake.
if a tv show, movie, book, or music doesn’t catch my interest within the first 30 seconds, minutes, or pages, it’s a no-go, regardless of how much better it may become.
if i order food and it doesn’t taste how i think it should (hello expectations…ugh) i will not eat it. i won’t send it back, but i won’t eat it. luckily, J likes leftovers.
i won’t drink from the same cup twice, it needs to be washed out before i reuse it, and anything i drink has to be fresh. if there is leftover water, wine, whatever, i dump it out and start over. i waste so much…
i’m also quickly becoming an organic food snob, and i have started judging people who don’t buy the organic version of whatever it is they are holding in their hands (granted there is one.)
i could go on forever…
February 9th, 2010 at 5:47 pm
I’m kind of a book snob, too. Like you, there are certain books/authors I won’t read. On the other hand, I (shamefully) read fantasy books about elves and dwarves and the like.
I’m a food/service snob. Remember that show Frasier? Oh, you don’t watch sitcoms. Well, Frasier and his brother Niles liked going to snooty restaurants and then picking apart the food and service when they got home. I have been known to make more than one Niles-worthy complaint about food or service. On the other hand, I’m not a wine snob. With few exceptions, there is a setting for almost every kind of wine. Wine is meant to be drunk and enjoyed… it just needs to be in the right setting.
Gosh, I could go on and on…
February 9th, 2010 at 7:39 pm
I don’t read romance novels, either. In fact, most “chick lit” bores me to tears. Additionally, I prefer to read non-fiction or Pulitzer Prize winning novels. (But I will openly admit that I have read several Nicholas Sparks novels during the summer on the beach and enjoyed them, as predictable as they may have been)
I buy fresh produce almost every day, but I always keep some frozen stuff on hand for when I make tuna casserole!
I don’t get Twitter. I just…don’t understand. What’s the point? I have yet to find someone who can explain it to me in a way that would make me want to use it.
And while I may have many snobbish behaviors, I have WAYYYYY too many non-snobbish behaviors to list on here. :-)
February 9th, 2010 at 10:35 pm
I really hope that some of my past pah pah activities have calmed down but I have this tendency to look over an article of clothing or item I may buy and do a thorough inspection. If there is a flaw, I refuse to buy it. I know, it’s awful. I do try to keep it in check.
February 10th, 2010 at 12:40 am
I hate romance novels too. In fact I hate romance movies. I refuse to watch them. BORING.
I also love watching Say Yes to the Dress. (Some of those brides or moms or friends are crazy!)
Lastly, I’m better than anyone else.
Just kidding!
Or am I?
February 10th, 2010 at 12:57 am
Wow! We are similar in a lot of ways but apparently not in our snobbery. I LOVED the Hangover. Laughed my ass off. I am on Twitter (though I only post 2-5 updates a day, more than that makes me think people need more to do). Although I avoid canned or frozen food now, I was raised on the stuff and think it tastes great (outside of the lack of actual nutritional content).
Things I AM a snob about include:
- The gym. People who show up in inappropriate clothes (jeans or open toe shoes) make me want to yell at them. Also people who go and just chit chat or visit. It doesn’t happen to me now (I’ve switched gyms and my BF trains there) but I used to see red if a guy dared to hit on me at the gym.
- Skin care. I can not use grocery store product lines. I buy the over-priced expensive stuff because to me, it works better. Same goes for makeup with the exception of mascara. Mascara can be grocery store bought for some reason.
I’m sure there are more, but those are the two that come to mind!
February 10th, 2010 at 1:04 am
your friends sound hilarious, i can picture the fake pipe puffing and it’s cracking me up!
February 11th, 2010 at 8:03 am
You hypocritical elitist snob, you!!
JK ;-)
February 11th, 2010 at 9:12 am
I don’t watch TV, follow sports or drink alcohol. I think that counts for this list? It makes it hard to relate to other people anyway.
February 11th, 2010 at 4:13 pm
Like Lizzie above, I’m probably the snobbiest of all my friends. I’m even snobby about being down-to-earth and outdoorsy… Hmm maybe I’m just judgmental. That said, I love 30 Rock and will watch sitcoms and old time, The Hangove cracked me up and Old School is one of my favorites, and I grew up reading Danielle Steel.
But I’m absolutely turning into a snob when it comes to wine. And for that I blame Mr. W. He’s the biggest snob I know.
February 11th, 2010 at 8:42 pm
I guess I’m a snob and a half. I always thought I was just particular and easily bored. I’ve been called eccentric.
Books -- I once got a free romance novel in some “labor survival kit” (as in child birth labor). I threw it out. Total trash. I love interesting novels, biographies and other non-fiction books. I love to find dollar books at garage sales. Lots of women around here are in book clubs and I can find lots of good stuff (as well as lots of junk I pass up).
TV -- When we had channels, I loved PBS. And that is all.
Movies -- Again, only interesting movies. Ridiculous inane movies are not for me. I like some movies people would not get. Like artsy and foreign films.
I do have a twitter account, but rarely check it and even more rarely update. I would be just find canceling my account. I’m not so thrilled with Facebook either. I’d cancel that account, but really it helps keep me connected with old friends and newer friends that I don’t see.
I detest canned veggies, but I will do frozen. Prefer fresh and really prefer organic.
I totally respect people who love sports, but I personally find them dull and pointless, sorry, but I’m just being honest. I can enjoy a good game here or there, but I don’t follow anything. For only 4 years I followed my college basketball team religiously.
Some other snob tendencies I have… I’m not a huge fan of pop music. Any pop I do like is often more obscure (though not all). I prefer other genres like classical, jazz and world music. I LOVE to learn about and experience other cultures. I like to camp out in the woods, where you can’t see your other camping neighbor’s tent. I’m particular about wine and I’m the only person I know (so far) who knows how to pronounce Gevertztraminer and knows where it originates from. I’m particular about the quality of clothes I buy. I wish I were better at style! I’m constantly concerned about the decor of our home and its cleanliness…….